Opinion: The seven crimes a passenger should never commit
If you're lucky enough to have a friend or family member give you a lift, we've outlined the unspoken passenger etiquette rules to observe at all times.
Ah, the season of family holidays and road trips. A time of travel, togetherness, forging bonds, making memories and quietly fostering a deep, unbridled rage towards your spouse, children, friends or extended family members.
Let's face it – spending endless hours on the road with your relatives can turn from blessing to curse pretty quickly.
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Boredom, carsickness and bickering aside, a lot of our road trip frustration can arise from poor passenger etiquette.
To that end, there are no excuses for bad behaviour when you have the privilege of sitting in the passenger seat.
While kids can get away with acting out in the back seat, there are certain things no adult passenger should ever do.
Whether you're sick of your partner's back-seat driving, or tired of your clueless cousin's commentary – we've devised the seven commandments for passengers. Obey them or else...
Thou shalt not do the courtesy wave on the driver's behalf
That is the driver's right and privilege. They can thank their fellow road users when and how they like.
Trying to usurp the courtesy wave rights from the passenger seat undermines the authority of the driver and makes you both look like idiots.
Thou shalt not sit in the back seat when the front seat is empty
No, this isn't an Uber and you're an adult, not a six-year-old. If the front seat is empty, you should be sitting in it, unless you have a toddler to supervise or an infectious illness of some kind.
Get in the front seat like a grown-up and, while you're at it, give any directions politely instead of barking orders.
Unless you’re a kid or in an Uber, don’t do this
Thou shalt not make a stressful situation more stressful
If the driver is merging across three lanes of traffic at 100km/h an hour, don't tell them about your relationship problems.
Similarly, if someone is attempting to navigate a tricky traffic situation, or listen to complicated directions from the sat-nav, don't tell them there's a new techno song you'd love to play for them RIGHT NOW.
Thou shalt not touch the soundsystem
Under no circumstances should a passenger ever touch the soundsystem without express permission.
Changing the track or lowering the volume are crimes that can and should be punished by immediate ejection from the vehicle.
Thou shalt not fiddle with the air conditioning
Dual-zone climate control exists purely to solve this problem.
If you're lucky enough to have your own temperature-controlled zone, by all means fiddle away.
But if you're in a single-zone situation, adjusting fan speed or playing with temperature controls should be strictly forbidden.
Thou shalt not show the driver photos on thy phone
You might think it's innocent, but showing the driver a meme or some holiday snaps on your phone could land them in a sticky situation.
In every state and territory, drivers can be hit with a hefty fine and demerit points for looking at a display operated by someone else in the vehicle.
Wait until you're safely parked to share the hilarious TikTok video.
Thou shalt not tune out on long drives
Someone else might be driving, but you're still on this journey together. That means no putting headphones in, watching social media videos and laughing at inside jokes with friends or snoozing.
Your poor driver can't do any of these things and their only option is to listen to music or chat to you, so you better make sure you provide some damn good topics of conversation.
So, what are your passenger crimes? Let us know in the comments below?
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